Author Archives: reba

The Big Easy

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The big news since the last blog was that Casey and Garret got hitched, and we traveled to New Orleans for the multiple-day love fest.

The dudes literally hang out in a bevy of palms in Jackson Square.

We opted to drive to Louisiana, instead of fly. Not only would the latter have been extremely expensive, but we wanted to avoid the many hassles of air travel, most notably the TSA feeling up our kids.

To make our road travels as stress-free as possible, we decided to take two days for the 12-hour trip. Cousin Meredith was also our partner in crime, which was great fun and quite helpful to boot. She played games with the boys, took them on bathroom breaks, tied their shoes, helped distribute car food, etc.

Poor thing, I think we wore her out! Nah, I’m pretty sure she had a large time and enjoyed the many antics that result from travels with Clan Dillingham.

Shopping for Mardi Gras masks on Bourbon Street w/ Meredith.

The trip down south went swimmingly. We saw landmarks, like the South Carolina peach under construction, and got a slowpoke view of Atlanta due to traffic. We were able to easily spot cool sites, including the Olympic torch, Cartoon Network, Coca-Cola, CNN, and the Georgia Capitol. Half the fun’s getting there, right?!

The boys were extremely excited each and every time we entered a new state, joyfully screaming when they were lucky enough to spot the “welcome to” sign. We tried to make our car tunes correspond with the geography, so you know the dudes were belting out “Sweet Home Alabama” by evening.

We spent our first night in Montgomery with my old pal, Jamie. The last time Stephen and I saw Jamie was when I was pregnant with Houston. It was wonderful for him to be able to meet the 3 Amigos, and for us to be able to meet his wife, Kim, and adorable toddler daughter, Claire.

After French rule, New Orleans was part of a Spanish colony and today’s Jackson Square was called Plaza de Armas. Then the French ruled again. Then America got the land in the Louisiana Purchase. Then the park was renamed after Gen. Andrew Jackson, hero of the Battle of New Orleans during the War of 1812. And then he rode this fame all the way to the White House. History’s so interesting.

Jamie treated our entire crew to a veritable feast at a Thai restaurant, and then we crashed for free at his father’s old house. Both gestures are indicative of Jamie’s sweet nature and willingness to always do for others.

I had a total fail, somehow managing to take zero pics of this memorable reunion. (That’s so unlike me.) I suppose we’ll just have to get together with you and the girls again some time soon, Jamie!

Driving across Lake Pontchartrain, jamming Lucinda Williams, soaking in the Big Easy skyline in front us: it was just a surreal thing. Some of you may remember, after a brief summer internship, I left New Orleans in August 1998, shaking my fist in the air and swearing that I would never be back.

Why on earth is there a giant cactus in the front yard of this home in the Irish Channel neighborhood? ‘Cause Nawlins does things big and bad, that’s why!

And here I was, with husband and kids in tow, back to see what she had to offer. Fortunately, the Crescent City and I made up and are good friends again.

We arrived in the evening without hassle and got settled into the well-preserved Garden District mansion in which we were renting with our crew: Meredith, Lisa, Albert, Gramsey, Papa, and Rick. For dinner, our first outing was a quick jaunt over the bumpy, broken sidewalks to the Irish Channel for yummy po’boys with hot sauce.

The next day, we took a street car to the French Quarter with Meredith. We ate at Deanie’s, corner of Iberville and Dauphine. Gabriel still talks about the full shrimp (with ihead and eyeballs and everything!) that garnished my Bloody Mary. And I still remember those succulent oysters on the half-shell. Mmm.

Beignets smothered in powder sugar & warm coffee w/ chicory: perfect medicine for a chilly day exploring the big city.

Once our bellies were full, we tooled down Bourbon Street while shopping for masks to wear to Casey’s Mardi Gras-themed wedding reception. Yes, many strange, tawdry, and debauched things were afoot on Rue des Bourbon, even during the middle of the day in wintertime. Zany.

Then we walked to Jackson Square, where we listened to a funky brass band; rested alongside the mighty Mississippi; and warmed up and recharged at Cafe Du Monde.

That night at the rehearsal dinner, we were treated to delicious local cuisine at the Tigermen Den in the artsy Bywater neighborhood. This place was so hip and quaint that we almost couldn’t find it or even figure out how to enter the old-home-turned-rustic-event-facility.

There’s something so intense about standing beside the Mississippi, as it flows boldly and freely through New Orleans. As Mark Twain wrote, “The Mississippi River will always have its own way; no engineering skill can persuade it to do otherwise.”

Two of Casey and Garret’s friends were performing mellow jazz on acoustic guitar and piano. Lisa made an intricately beautiful charm cake for all the bridesmaids. Plus, there were four king cakes from which to choose for dessert, so the whole New Orleans vibe just permeated the relaxed evening.

The next day was the wedding, which was held at the magnificent Saint Theresa of Avila, the second oldest Catholic church in the city. Casey looked drop-dead gorgeous, Garret was handsome and oh-so happy, and Papa was extremely proud to give away his beloved granddaughter.

Meredith was the cantor, expertly performing hymns throughout the ceremony. I mean, I knew my niece could sing, but her version of Ave Maria literally brought me to tears. Wow!

Karate chops by by the 3 Amigos & Meredith @ the Tigermen Den.

The reception was a blast, of course. People donned festive masks and Mardi Gras beads, sipped Sazerac cocktails, feasted upon flavorful fare, like seared tuna and bacon-wrapped dates, and danced like no one was watching!

In fact, the 3 Amigos stole the show with their moves. Gabriel and Zeke were some of the first to hit the dance floor and really set the tone for some mad boogying, and soon thereafter, Houston joined in the frenetic fun. So much for unsocialized homeschoolers, eh?!

After heading back to the house to get the boys settled in for the night, Stephen and I hung with an ultra-innebriated Rick. So, we opted to play it safe and hit the nearby Verret’s Lounge, as opposed to trekking all the way to the French Quarter to meet up with the wedding crew.

It’s a little blurry & I’m blinking (of course!), but here’s the family-of-the-bride photo … & ain’t she a gorgeous bride!

Verret’s was a cozy, hole-in-the-wall kind of joint, brimming with lots of friendly locals, strong drinks, and killer live music. Unfortunately, Rick spilled his drink a little too close to the pianist (translation: ON the pianist), so we had to hit the road. But at least Rick picked up the tab for our many mojitos … thanks, dude!

Plus, our early arrival back gave us a chance to hang out with Lisa and Albert, who had been super busy with wedding stuff till then. You know you’re having a grand time when you stay up till 5 in the morning watching economics videos with your big sister. Yes, we Quate girls confidently embrace our inner dork!

Then our last day in NOLA included jaunts to the Rum House, a great Caribbean restaurant on lively Magazine Street; a stroll through Lafayette Cemetery No. 2; and then a kid-free night out with Lisa and Meredith to Delachaise, a snazzy wine and appetizer bar that serves some incredible Cuisses de Grenouille (translation: frog legs)!

Lafayette Cemetery is at the same time beautiful and eerie, stark and graceful, tranquil and impactful. The above-ground tombs are a reminder of NOLA’s rich history, as well as the topographical fact that about half of the city is below sea level, giving it an extremely high water table.

So, our trip to New Orleans was a smashing success. And I, who had previously felt so bitterly about the Big Easy, now have quite the sweet spot for this wonderfully complex city and all that makes it so vibrant and unique.

Now, the trip home wasn’t so hot. I mean, we were all pretty tired and a bit bummed about our fun nearing an end, so there were some short fuses for this portion of the journey. There was even a pee-pee mishap (ugh!), but we survived. And what you can expect, really?!

We made it to Auburn, Alabama, on day one heading north. Luckily, the hotel where we stayed had an outdoor hot tub and heated pool, which eased the boys’ road weariness and post-Big Easy blues.

One of the many quirky things found in the Garden District mansion where we stayed in NOLA.

Overall, though, I am quite impressed with the 3 Amigos’ behavior, fortitude, and ability to handle new challenges, big cities, road trips, lots of walking, and unseasonably cold weather (for which we way under-packed). Way to go, dudes!

Congrats to Casey and Garret on embarking on their new life together. Also a hardy thanks to Daddy for funding our vacation, Lisa for scoring the mansion rental, Meredith for being our partner in crime, and God for keeping us safe.

And here’s to our next family adventure, whether that be another trip to a famous metropolis, a trek to one of America’s natural wonders, or perhaps even a move to a new and unfamiliar locale just ‘cuz. New Hampshire, anyone?!?

Dashing through December

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So, it’s only early 2015, and December is already a blur. We had a nice Christmas, trying our best to keep things as non-complicated and stress-free as possible, as well as very focused on Jesus.

But man, even with mucho intentionality and diligence, simplifying anything — much less the holiday mania that takes over for the last quarter of the calendar year — is still just incredibly challenging in our culture. Fighting social conformity can be downright exhausting.

Zeke, Houston & Gabriel in one of a slew of incredible pics of the kids taken by the super-talented Miss Christie during a fall photo shoot at Old Mill of Guilford.

That’s not to say we didn’t some holly-jolly fun, though. The boys and I trekked up to Richmond to see family early in the month. Gramsey and Papa even watched the dudes one evening so that I could spend some quality time with my oldest pal in the world, Ingrid.

We did Thai with Lisa, Dina, and Meredith and then hit a brew pub. Angela and Shelley met up with us there, and then the four of us headed down to my old stomping ground of the Fan for more drinks and shenanigans. Good times, great oldies!

The 3 Amigos got to play laser tag twice last month. Their first time was on a boys-only outing (that also included bowling) with Daddy, and Mr. Jeremy and Bret — some cools pals we met through the J-Crew.

Wow, “double trouble” have never looked cuter!

Granny took the boys to laser tag the next time, but we insisted they pay for it themselves, since it adds up to be quite the pricey outing. Plus, those kids’ piggy banks never seem to be lacking in cold, hard cash. Just a little economics 101.

As mentioned previously, Houston is finally questioning the existence of the man in the red suit. I think the little kid in him is still clinging a tiny bit to the festive fable. But the logical big boy in him is simply questioning the irrationality of it all.

“I think Santa is Mommy,” Houston announced to his bros. “Uh, but Mommy doesn’t even have a beard,” retorted Zeke with matter-of-fact confidence and a bit of disdain for the premise itself. Yep, he and Gabe remain steadfast Santa believers for sure!

Oh my, what a handsome young man!

The dudes received many wonderful Christmas gifts, some for fun (Monopoly, Battleship, a BB gun, the Star Wars DVD box set); some educational (Story of the World audio book, art supplies, a veritable library of great books); and others more utilitarian (luggage, water bottles, ear protection for target practice).

They also gave, including a $5-each donation toward the “Make Cornbread, Not War” baseball cap I bought Daddy (with his own money, of course) per his request. Gabriel and Zeke are extremely generous kids, always willing to donate a decent amount of money to whatever the good cause.

Houston, on the other hand, is pretty stingy, and usually has to be gently coaxed into being more charitable. Maybe that’s because he has a better understanding of money and math. But still, sharing one’s blessings with a grateful heart is an important lesson.

The 3 Amigos doing what they do best: loving & laughing. This one is my favorite Old Mill photo.

We watched Phish’s live webcast from Miami for New Year’s Eve, and the boys actually stayed up till midnight, thanks to mucho Dr. Pepper early in the evening and coffee cocktails (comprised of mostly creamer with a dash of joe) for the last stretch of the night.

Here are some highlights:

  • “My favorite band is Phish,” Gabriel proclaimed only a couple songs into the show.
  • “I just can’t help myself,” Zeke admitted about his need to boogie down.
  • “When the music’s louder, I dance better,” Gabe explained.
  • “I’m doing some mighty mad mojo,” Zeke added.
  • “I need some caffeine to stay awake! Anybody got any caffeine?” a tired Houston pleaded as we neared midnight.

Just like the old days: Shelley, Ingrid, Angela & I drinking too much beer & having fun. Good times, bad hangover.

Gabriel recently said, “I like girls better than boys,” adding that he has three girlfriends: the preacher’s daughter, a crush from the CC practicum last summer, and an older neighbor (she’s 9). Our ladies’ man has since modified that number down to a modest two.

Although definitely a lover, Gabriel is also quite the fighter. In fact, Sunday marked the first time he truly retaliated against big brother’s “man-handling.” It was such a fierce display of self-defense that Houston even shed a few tears. The ever-changing dynamic of three brothers so close in age sure is an incredible thing to behold.

Sweet things

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“The best things in life are nearest: Breath in your nostrils, light in your eyes, flowers at your feet, duties at your hand, the path of right just before you. Then do not grasp at the stars, but do life’s plain, common work as it comes, certain that daily duties and daily bread are the sweetest things in life.” — Robert Louis Stevenson

Clan Dillingham kicks back during the annual hay ride up the mountain to get our Christmas tree. (This year, we named our Fraser fir Navi.)

Our lives have been filled with many sweet things recently. First, we successfully wrapped our fall semesters of CC community and Spanish lessons just before Thanksgiving.

School still marches on around here during the holiday, though, since I’m the queen of playing catch-up. But it’s so nice to have a much less hurried schedule.

The extra time has allowed the twins to do speech therapy twice a week just for December. Their therapists say they’ve both made tremendous progress and are so close to nailing all the sounds with which they formerly struggled, so this is simply to give them an extra boost.

The obligatory dudes-with-Santa Claus photo taken during our annual holiday outing to Sugar Plum Farm.

Doing extra appointments was my idea, since we have decided not to do speech therapy in the new year. It’s insanely expensive, and we have no plans to meet our insurance deductible in 2015. (Of course, we say that every year, and somehow, we always do.)

But more importantly, the therapists and I agree that it’s really not necessary, since Gabe and Zeke are on the right path to better articulation, improved mouth and tongue control, breaking old habits of improper speech, and self-correcting when they say something incorrectly. Way to go, boys!

Sure Gabriel and Zeke face challenges in some areas (as we all do!), but they also excel in other areas, like their natural musical ability. In fact, they’ve really shown an impassioned interest in piano as of late, so much so that Houston has been giving them “lessons.”

A napping Granny makes a comfy pillow on which Houston relaxes during our time in the mountains for Thanksgiving.

Therefore, we thought it was high time they has their “official assessment” with Miss Julie, Houston’s beloved piano teacher. Turns out that Gabe and Zeke passed their tests of fine motor skills, basic knowledge (like knowing right from left), musical understanding (such as repeating rhythms), and overall maturity with flying colors. Yee haw!

So, once we find an open and easy spot on our calendar, and tweak our budget to be able to afford triple the lessons, they’ll be tickling the ivories just like big bro. This will probably happen in late spring-early summer, once CC and Spanish wrap. Until then, they’ll keep on happily improvising with Houston and jamming out their own original ditties.

Much like the twins speech therapy, I won’t be going to physical therapy in 2015, since I’ve also improved dramatically. Thank the Lord … and thanks for paying for all my PT and chiropractor visits, Stephen! I’ve gotten way stronger and more flexible, and am in far less pain than I had been.

The 3 Amigos enjoy our educational jaunt to Linville Caverns, located within Humpback Mountain, just outside of Marion, NC.

Do I still have occasional issues? Sure, but at least now I feel like I now have the body of 43 year old, and not the body of a decrepit, debilitated geezer of 83.

Plus, I know how to manage and diminish my aches and pains now: daily stretching and strength training, frequent low-impact exercise, using a heating pad nightly, and glopping on the icy hot when need be. It’s all finally under control.

We went to Granny’s for Thanksgiving, and got to see a ton of family. From the Norwoods of Michigan, to the Biddix crew, who are spread far and wide across Carolina, it was a holly-jolly good time!

Houston & Zeke play around in Sugar Plum’s toy train — always a favorite during our time @ the choose-and-cut tree farm.

In addition to making our annual trek to Sugar Plum Farms, we also ventured to Linville Caverns. This was the boys’ first taste of learning about stalactites and stalagmites, and they seemed to appreciate exploring this cool geological wonder. (Getting them some fool’s gold from the gift shop didn’t hurt either.)

Another night, we adventured to an overlook near Marion to see if we could catch a glimpse of the Brown Mountain Lights. No such luck witnessing the fabled “ghost lights,” but it sure was fun trying.

What’s interesting is that their most talked-about memory of Thanksgiving was a commercial they saw of young girl twerking in her “skivvies” (as the boys, in all their beautiful innocence, describe undies) while watching a Christmas movie on a supposedly family-friendly channel. Uggh! Oh, how I love my Netflix.

Gabriel rides on Clifford the Big Red Dog during our outing to Safari Nation.

It’s happening: Houston is finally starting to have doubts about this whole Santa thing. During our first viewing of “Elf” for the season, he asked, “So, do parents really leave the gifts?!” My response was vague but effective, I think: “Just believe what you want to believe, sweetie.”

More proof of the kids growing up way too fast: “Mommy, I want to be a policeman,” explained Houston the other day. “Why is that?” I inquired.

“Because I like manhandling people,” replied the very-tall-for-his-age child who has been known to rough-house way too often with his little bros. Such a matter-of-fact worldly comment from such a still-so-young dude.

Zeke decided to cheers Navi with his hot cocoa. If that’s not holly-jolly enough for you, you should hear his impromptu Christmas singing … so cute!

Some other “sweet things” we’ve been up to:

  • Going to Asher’s 8th birthday party, held a week before the J-Crew’s big move south;
  • Spending some last memorable minutes with the J-Crew while helping them pack up their moving truck;
  • Attending a Mercy Hill homeschool playdate, where we feasted on potluck goodies and the boys made Jesse Tree ornaments;
  • Meeting out our old pals, Miss Beth, Mr. Alan, Matthew, and Jonathan, for lunch and then lots of shenanigans at a bounce house;
  • and the boys enjoying lots of map drawing and chapter-book reading … Houston even read “Moby Dick.” Yep, sweet for sure!