Thank God

According to our Cincy docs, the surgery was a success! All signs from Monday’s echo and ultrasound currently point to recovery for the boys, including improved readings for Gabriel’s heart, good Doppler readings for both babies, and more fluid in Zeke’s sac. Things seem to be evening out between the twins and the adverse effects of their previously critical state seem to be reversing. I’ll be getting weekly ultrasounds and occasional echos here at home to make sure all these trends continue, but we feel confident that the lasering of my placenta’s 39 faulty vascular connections has stopped the progression of TTTS … and just in the knick of time. Since equilibrium has hopefully been achieved, Gabriel and Zeke are on the road to better health and growth in the womb. Now all we have to do is keep them cooking in there for as long as possible. Thank God to all of you for your well wishes and prayers, and to the brilliant and caring surgeons at the Fetal Care Center of Cincinnati!

We hit the road after getting the good news yesterday afternoon, spent the night in West Virginia, and arrived home this morning. Stephen and I freaked out when we saw Houston. He was a tad apprehensive at first, probably due to my dramatic tears of joy, but quickly decided that we were cool enough to be hugged and loved. We were really getting homesick our last couple of days in Ohio, so being reunited with our happy boy for even just one day has already eased the anxiety, stress and tension we have built up over the past week and two days. This, together with the great surgery prognosis, is fueling us for what we know will be the challenging weeks and months ahead of us. Thank God we have such a loving and inspirational son, and we pray that God chooses to bless us with two more beautiful boys.

Over One Heckuva Hurdle

Thankfully, the twins and I made it through surgery! It was such a crazy experience. I was more worried about all that could go wrong with the procedure before getting to the hospital than I was when we were actually there. Sometimes I was thinking, “Well, we’re finally here … let’s get this show on the road,” while other times I felt like it was all a dream, as if I was watching somebody else’s drama unfold before me — a weird mix of proactive relief and out-of-body experience. Stephen got to be with me for all the prep work until the team of nurses and the anesthesiologist were ready to take me back to the OR. I told the anesthesiologist to knock me out as much as possible because I didn’t want to hear all that was going on during the surgery, but she said she couldn’t totally sedate me since it would be too much of a risk to my health for this type of procedure. She said I would be more in a kind of “twilight.”

And that I was. I could open my eyes and hear people talking, but I would drift off a little here and there. The epidural only numbed me from about the bottom of my ribs to my toes, so I could feel the pressure of what the surgeons were doing, but didn’t feel any pain. After hooking me up to monitors and oxygen, getting me situated on my side on the operating table, and putting that horrible, stinging needle into my spine for the epidural, Dr. Lim made an incision through my abdomen and uterus, and then he and doctors Polzin and Crombleholme “mapped” my placenta with the fetoscope, determining which vascular connections needed to be lasered, while a nurse took notes on their findings (this took the majority of the time). There were other nurses present (I was told about 10 people total were in the room) working their respective monitors, taking fetal pictures, working the ultrasound and doing other cool stuff. Then Dr. Lim went through the same incision to selectively laser the problem-causing connections. They glued my incision (yes, they used some super-duper medical glue to seal up my tummy), unhooked all my gadgets and wheeled me out to Stephen, who says the whole thing took a little less than two hours. Amazing!

Even though the babies and I all survived the procedure, we knew that the first 24 hours post-surgery were our next hurdle. The docs drew more than 3 liters of extra amniotic fluid (about six pounds) out of Gabriel’s sac — obviously, an environmental change that is quite shocking to my boy. Dr. Lim said because of this change in amniotic pressure, as well as a change in blood flow, Gabriel’s little heart would really be put to the test during this time. Of course, an array of other very scary stuff could also happen, so we were stressed out last night to say the least. Moreover, I had a million cords and tubes hooked up to me, and my legs were throbbing from being on continued bed rest, so I was not feeling quite up to par mentally or physically. Luckily, Stephen spent the night with me in the hospital and, even though he was also wary of all the horrible scenarios we could possibly face, he remained strong and helped me get through the extremely challenging night.

This morning began with an ultrasound. Connie, the wonderful tech, notified us immediately that she spotted two heartbeats. Thank God, both Gabriel and Zeke were alive! At the end of the ultrasound, Dr. Polzin said that Gabriel’s heart rhythms seemed to be improving from some fairly typical dips they had been showing previously, Zeke’s fluid seemed to be slowly increasing, and both babies’ Doppler readings were looking good. Then Dr. Crombleholme visited me in my room and reiterated that all signs were “encouraging” thus far. Thank the Lord we made it over yet another hurdle!

We’ve been back at the hotel since a little before noon today. I’ve been chilling around the room and Stephen went down to the hotel bar for a bit to see a band doing jazz standards. So now we have to bide our time till Monday, when the babies get another echo on their hearts at Cincinnati Children’s and then another ultrasound is done with Dr. Polzin at Good Samaritan, a sister hospital specializing in OBGYN stuff. If those tests show that the surgery has indeed ceased the progression of TTTS and the boys are positively responding to their new environments, we will be heading home first thing Tuesday morning to see our other boy, who we have missed terribly.

Being away from Houston has made all this Cincy drama that much harder. We cannot wait to see him run, laugh, talk, dance, make funny signs and do all the magical things he does every day. Houston is such an amazing little human. I just hope he somehow understands that we’re away from him in an effort to keep our family intact. We know that he’ll appreciate it when Gabriel and Zeke are around to play with and/or beat up, while all three sport the Reds baseball caps Daddy bought for his boys at the game the other day. Houston’s going to be the best big brother ever … and those are the days for which we’re striving, one hurdle at a time!

Off To Cincy

With the help of Wi-Fi Internet, a laptop and lots of pillows, I am able to blog while on bed-rest. Well, Stephen and I (and the twins, of course) are off to Cincinnati tomorrow morning. We’ll be taking our time while driving up, stopping for my many pee breaks, and to stretch out and get the blood flowing (on doctor’s orders so that I don’t form any blood clots). It’s about 7 and a 1/2 hours without stops, so that shouldn’t be too bad.

Our “adventure” at the Fetal Care Center begins on Monday at 7:30 a.m. and ends with an appointment scheduled for 11:30 p.m. The day consists of another ultrasound and echo-cardiogram, individual and then family consultation, a team meeting with the surgical staff, and then an oh-so-fun MRI. Our hope is that our fetoscopic laser surgery will be fast-tracked for Tuesday due to what the findings were at our Friday ultrasound here with the local maternal fetal care specialists. Similar to the findings of my last ultrasound on Wednesday, things weren’t horrible, but the amnio-reduction really only bought us some extra time. In short, Zeke still wasn’t “stuck” nor was he exhibiting signs of distress — his sac had some fluid, he moved around a bit, his heart rate was strong, and he and Gabriel’s condition was still somewhere between a stage 1 and 2 — but the equalizing we had hoped for just hadn’t occurred. We knew the chances of that happening were slim, so this didn’t really come as a shock. Dr. Joy informed us that another amnio wouldn’t be necessary (music to my ears!), since the first outcome wasn’t that effective overall. Moreover, it could possibly hold us up from our Cincy plans, should I have to be readmitted to the hospital for observations post-amnio. Therefore, we’re taking the bull by the horns and going for the laser surgery — the closest thing to a cure that exists for TTTS.

Here’s the gist of the surgery: since the twins have an unequal sharing of blood to their separate sacs via their one placenta, the doctors will locate the vascular connections that are creating these “miscommunications” (presumably via the MRI) and “photocoagulate” (or destroy) them with the laser. This will even out the amniotic fluid in each baby’s sac, and in turn, create a more stable environment for normal physical, mental and physiological growth, while also greatly reducing the chances of an extremely premature birth.

Sure, there are innate risks with such an invasive surgery. But with the way my TTTS is progressing, the chances of one or both twins dying before they’re even viable for emergency c-section at 24 weeks, or at the very least, developing severe physical and/or neurological defects should they miraculously survive beyond that point are both likely if nothing more is done. So, we see this as a no-brainer. We’ll be sure to keep y’all posted from Cincy when we can. Keep up those prayers and just know that spirits are high with Clan Dillingham!

A quickie Houston update … we’ve been trying to keep his routine as uninterrupted as possible. While Gramsey was here, she took Houston on two play dates: one with Dixie and one with Gracie, his two best home girls. And then today, Granny took him to the birthday party of Mason, my old co-worker’s two-year-old boy. Plus, Houston has had plenty of people to take him on his walks and play with him outside, not to mention the fact that he has just been digging the extra time with Daddy, Granny, Grumps, Gramsey and Papa. He’s loving it!